Worth it

Edward Elric walks into Roy Mustang's office a changed man - taller, calmer. Happier. Roy has been expecting him, he has been preparing himself for this, but still...

There's something bittersweet in the pit of Roy's stomach.

"Fullmetal," he says and stands up from behind his desk. He hesitates for a moment, but then he snaps Ed a quick salute, more as a sign of respect than from any need for propriety. "How nice of you to show up on time for once." For the last time, is what Roy means. How nice of you to come on time for our last meeting.

Ed salutes back, quick and nonchalant, with a flesh-and-bone right arm and a lethal grin. "I could hardly wait, bastard," he says, tone amused and so obviously teasing that Roy returns Ed's grin with one of his own. "The first fucking time I was actually looking forward to coming in."

Roy sits back down, and starts shuffling through his papers as if Edward's release forms aren't waiting on the very top of the pile. "You wound me."

"Don't worry," Edward says, waving his hand around in a dismissive motion, "I'll be out of your hair soon enough." He thumps down on the chair in front of Roy's desk, which has most definitely not been supplied just for this occasion.

Roy's eyes flicker up to Edward as he slides the papers towards him over the desk. Edward is right, of course, and Roy should probably feel relieved after all the grief Fullmetal has given him, but...

Instead, all Roy feels is a vague sort of disappointment.

"Please," he says, "sign here and here." He points at the appropriate places in the documents with the back of his pen before handing it to Edward.

All the details of Edward's resignation have been solved before hand, talked over thoroughly in person back when they were still stuck at the hospital, then at length and multiple times over the phone while Ed has been in Resembool. They both know what the papers say; there's no need to study them further. All that is left is the signature.

Edward takes Roy's pen and pulls the papers closer to inspect them quickly; Roy steeples his fingers under his chin and watches as Edward's eyes flicker over the documents, before making an affirmative noise at the back of his throat, flipping the pen in his fingers with dexterity he never possessed as an automail user, and — hovering the tip above the empty line.

Roy holds his breath. But — no. There's no reason for Edward to stay; he has achieved all of his goals, and after having played such major a role in thwarting the end of Amestris, he is more than due of some well-deserved rest. Roy wants Ed to sign the papers, and he almost says so, but—

Ed seems to snap out of whatever stupor he was in first.

He signs.

The scratch of pen on paper sounds inordinately loud in the office, and Ed leans back when he's done, heaving out a sigh, looking sort of stricken.

Roy breaks the silence first. "Congratulations, civilian Elric," he says, and collects the papers. "You are a free man now."

"I am, aren't I?" Ed asks, and looks up at Roy with a helpless grin. "I'm off the leash."

Roy smirks. "How does it feel?" he asks wryly.

Ed seems to consider it for a moment, before he says, "Strangely anticlimactic. I don't really feel any different than I did this morning."

Roy hums. Strangely anticlimactic is one way to put it, even though Roy would have said 'rewarding'. It's how it feels for him now, as if the accomplishment were his own. All the pain and blood and tears haven't been for nothing, and it's quite the reassuring thought.

Ed's eyes widen suddenly. "Wait a minute," he says. "You're not my boss anymore."

"I suppose not," Roy replies with some well-founded distrust.

Ed blinks, and says, flat and dry, "Go fuck yourself," as if trying out how the words would fit in his mouth. Then the corners of his lips turns down and his forehead wrinkles. "That didn't feel nearly as good as I thought it would."

"Maybe because you've never held back with the sentiment in the first place," Roy replies flatly, but he's suppressing a smile; did he expect anything different from Edward? Of course not.

They sit in silence for a few moments longer, Ed looking around, drinking in the sight of the office; Roy pretending to read over Ed's release forms while secretly glancing at Ed every now and then.

But they can't sit here like this forever. Roy sighs eventually, standing up, Edward's chair scraping across the floor as he hurries to follow.

"That would be all," Roy says quietly, the heavy, bittersweet feeling in his stomach back at full force. "Thank you for your service. It has been a - well." Roy's lips quirk in amusement."Pleasure is perhaps too strong a word."

It had been difficult, Roy means. Sometimes I wanted to strangle you for how much work your mere existence seemed to have given me, he means. Sometimes, I wanted to strangle myself.

But it has been worth it.

Ed scowls. "Asshole," he snaps, and reels back a little, his jaw twitching as he works himself up to whatever he's going to say next.

Roy watches in slight alarm.

"Uh," Ed starts. "Winry told me to tell you, and I think she's right. And Al would agree, too, so..." He trails off for a moment, looking at Roy a little reluctantly, like he's scared of how this will go over. "Thank you," he says after a moment, voice pitched low, the words only meant for Roy to hear, full of meaning and gravity. "Who knows how things would have gone if you hadn't found us, and - just. Thanks. Is what I mean."

Roy blinks, keeping his expression flat with sheer force of will, even though his eyes desperately want to boggle. "I'm sure you would have managed," he says in the end, his voice surprisingly level. And because he thinks Edwards's gratitude, something so rarely expressed, should be acknowledged, he adds, "But you're welcome." And there has to be something better Roy could say to this, to make Ed understand that he has it somewhat backwards, that Roy should be thanking him —

But Ed seems content. He smiles at Roy sheepishly and says, "So, this is it then, then."

Roy nods. "This is it."

"Goodbye, General." Like tearing off a band-aid.

"Goodbye, Edward." So, so bittersweet, rewarding, disappointing. Worth it.

Ed gives a quick half-bow, and turns to walk away, his ponytail swinging behind him. Roy watches with helpless frustration after his retreating back, and just before Ed reaches the door, Roy calls after him. "Edward."

Ed turns.

Roy breathes evenly. "I'll be seeing you," he says. A statement, not a question. Definitely not a plea.

Ed frowns. "Of course," he says slowly, like he doesn't know why Roy's saying that, like it's not even a concern. Like it's a sure thing. He grins. "I doubt I could get rid of you even if I wanted to." And with that he's out, the door closing with a soft click behind him.

Roy slumps back into his chair, fingers running over the resignation form softly, as if to make sure it's real. He looks up from the papers and blinks dazedly around his office. It doesn't look any different, as if nothing has changed in the past few minutes, or even years.

He clears his throat. "Well," he says and his voice resonates around the empty room, the only thing to answer him. But in the outer office sits Captain Hawkeye and the rest of the team, hard at work, and somewhere in the city Edward is ready to wreak havoc as a part of his blissfully military-free life.

Things have changed, but the future isn't bleak.

Before Roy knows it he's grinning, too.